We found out today that a beloved friend of our family passed away. Iris Rache. She was the person most like what I thought an aunt should be....so maybe that is where I modeled my Auntie persona on. There is certainly some of Iris in me. I hope she achieved enlightenment in this lifetime. If not and she has to come back here for another ride and if I don't achieve it too....I hope to god we get to meet again. If not then on the other side in another place. I have never thought of Iris with anything but a smile in my heart and love in my soul.
Iris was a larger than life personality. It might be why I am drawn to those types of folks. She never talked down to a child. She had dogs as I recall they where smaller dogs and she had cats too...I could be wrong on this as many a year has blurred my memories of childhood. Her pets where nice (unlike my grand pa's dogs) and her house was fun to go to because she had neat cool stuff. It was messier then ours and my house is too ;-). Love radiated through her home. It was cozy, cluttered, a bit chaotic but warm and happy. I don't think mom ever said hey lets go to Iris' an I said no.
She had a wraspy New York accent and she had a big laugh. She smoked like a chimney but back in the 60's and 70's who didn't. She was kind, honest and loved to laugh. She was masculine as I called her once when she was at our house for dinner and the stove broke. She fixed it and I mentioned she was masculine. My mother was horrified....I love you mom but you are very prim and proper for such a die hard liberal ;-). Iris just laughed and said "yeah honey, I am".
She was a die hard liberal activist. And while I didn't see her so much once I grew up and I am soooo saddened by that because I loved her dearly, I doubt her activism ever changed ;-). She, Pearl, mommy, Rev. Eaton, and the rest where very much in the "movement" shifting this country for all of us. Ok, maybe white Anglo Saxon protestant males may not agree, but hey they have had their time. A bunch of people worked long and hard to make sure that we all had opportunities. They laughed a lot, worked hard and played hard. And when all is said and done this country is a much better place for the contributions they made. I remember a picnic at Rev. Eaton's with his family and how much fun we had. I remember many an afternoon and evening at Iris and Pearls. Do I remember specifics no but the memories are like the wonderful warm comforters that Iris had all around. They make me smile, they warm my heart and make me greatful for having had the opportunity to have such a great role model.
Well I need to stop before I start sobbing. There has been a lot of loss too close to home this year. Thank you Iris. Thank you for teaching me all that you did and for always having those giant warm bear hugs for me, for your wonderful laugh, and you big heart. I am blessed to have had your touch on my life. I send you blessings and love as you make your transition. I send blessing and love to all whose life you touch and who feel this loss so deeply.
Iris was always there for us. She was there when my father was in the worst alcoholism of his life. I remember her being there for my mom and for us. Her wonderful ability to talk honestly and truthfully to children in a non-baby talk way made her a hit with me. I always appreciated and have always worked hard to treat all kids like just shorter younger adults.
Parents and Children live secret lives from one and another. That is the way it is suppose to be...they have their life together and then when they are alone they have their life apart. Iris was one of those people that could be a part of each's secret life.....and a part of their life as a whole. Which is a wonderful thing and something I hope I emulate with my friends and family. I always knew she was there for me and my family. I knew that I could have called her at anytime and she would have been there to listen or help. I am sorry I didn't call her just to say hi on all the times I thought about it, and her.
Iris in all her glory provided a bright ray of sunshine into my childhood and for that I am ever thankful, greatful and blessed. She taught me volumes and the imprint she left on me huge. Ask anyone who knows much about my childhood or early years...and they will have heard me say I considered Iris my Aunt. So for all my kids who read this...you may say a private thanks to Iris for having provided me a role model for that relationship. For anyone reading this...may you be blessed with an Iris of your own in your life.
The Washington Post was wrong...there maybe no immediate family by conventional standards that she left behind. But she left behind an extended family that I imagine is more vibrant then most real families (except mine). I certainly consider myself a member of that family...even if I was more like the prodigal daughter that never returned. But I know she always loved me anyway ;-)...just as I did her.
LU2PM Iris
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I was just thinking of Iris today -- a snowy day in February 2019. So I googled about to catch some Iris comfort, and here I am. Thank you so much for this blog and tribute to Iris! Iris was my real estate agent who helped me to buy the first house that I or my parents or grandparents, had ever bought. And Iris became my first friend here when I moved to Maryland from Ohio in 2003. I think of Iris a lot, of Pearl (the three of us took some Tai Chi classes together in Takoma Park), of her Westie dog Pepper, of the delicious holiday dinner at her home she invited me to . . . we love you Iris! Miss you! Thank you for being so awesome!
Post a Comment